Thursday, April 10, 2008

Moral Dilemma: Juno Sucking vs. CMU Pride

Tomorrow 'Smart People' opens up and features the scenic backdrop of our amazing campus, Carnegie Mellon University. I really like our campus, and I am happy that the ugly buildings that don't match the traditional architecture of the university are mostly hidden (Wean, the Gates Building)... This makes me psyched to see it in a movie, because I WAS THERE!!! THAT'S KIND OF MY HOME!!! SUCK IT!!!

However, this movie stars Ellen Page. It also stars Sarah Jessica Parker who isn't very attractive to me and has to be pretty old by now. But let's get back to Ellen Page. Ellen Page = Juno.

As many PND and frequenters know, I fucking hate Juno. God I hate this movie. Anytime I hear someone discussing how original it was, I shake with rage. I constantly regret that I had no idea Ellen Page was on my campus for an extended period of time as I would have protested the film shooting until she gave me my money back for that 90 minutes of absolute torture. Not only was she massively annoying with her completely 'uncaring' attitude and over the top rudeness, she was FAT AND PREGNANT! She reminded me, kind of, of this fat girl who was talking too much and hogging the mic on rock band at Christo's one night. Via the commutative property, you suck Ellen Page and I hate you too.

A friend of mine noted that if I hated Juno and Ellen Page's character in that movie, it is going to be much of the same in Smart People. A snobby, unattractive girl (a leader of a high school young republican's club seeking perfect SATs... does it get worse??) who has too much to bear at such a hard age! Go to hell you unoriginal writers, and maybe someone should apologize to Ms. Page's mother for typecasting her in the most awful way possible.

Anyways, at this point I think I am still going to see this movie just because I love our campus a lot and really want to see it made look good. CMU rocks, and if Ellen Page says one bad word about this place in this movie, we are taking a PND road trip and we are gonna throwdown you suckwad.


  1. i'm so pleased with this post

  2. Yet she's making a but load of money and you're not. Butt hurt much?